Campbell Soup

Throwing myself a pity party…

Yes, I’m feeling sorry for myself so if you don’t want to hear my pity party, then you might want to stop reading. 

In general I’m a pretty happy and positive person, but sometimes little nasty things just start to collect and wait for something bigger to happen that puts you right into a bad funk. I guess you could say that’s what happened this weekend. I don’t need to go into detail of what happened, but let’s just say I was deeply hurt and disappointed by someone I love and trust very much. I guess maybe I expected too much? I don’t know… 

On top of that, it was a best friend’s birthday yesterday, we celebrated and had a good time on Saturday, but I guess the consensus out of my 3 closest friends was that since I have a baby, I didn’t want to be invited for further birthday celebrations on Sunday. Maybe that’s what I need to get used to because this isn’t the first time this has happened. Usually I don’t cry or whine about feeling left out, I just find something else to do… I guess after what happened this weekend I was feeling more alone and sad than normal and was expecting my friends to be there for me like I am for them. Another disappointment.

I haven’t felt this lonely and disconnected in a very long time. The only thing I can do is just keep on trucking, and move on. Maybe it’s time for a change of scenery. Maybe I should look in a direction that I won’t be set up for disappointment. What or where that is? Not sure yet. All I know is I hate feeling like this and something definitely needs to change. I think I will give myself one more day to feel sorry myself, but tomorrow I am looking for new things that make me happy. Maybe reconnecting with old friends or finding another new hobby. Whatever it is, I hope I find it soon. 

Challenges

For the most part I am very happy with my life. I have a wonderful husband, a beautiful baby girl, a herd of loving dogs, a supportive bunch of family and friends. There are a few things I find challenging. For example, I am so unhappy with the job I have now - it’s a dead end, unorganized, frustrating at times, and has not provided me with the opportunities I thought I would have. I have so much more potential - the problem is I don’t know what I want to do with it. I think I need a career change - i need to step outside of my comfort zone - i NEED to find something I can be passionate about, or at least somewhat enjoy doing for the rest of my life. Even if it’s a temporary fix - i absolutely need to stop being lazy and start applying.

Another challenge I will be facing soon - running a half marathon. I have never in my life ran more that 3 miles at a time. WTF was I thinking? I’m excited and nervous at the same time. I think it’s great that I have a goal to work towards, but I have signed up, I have paid, I have a friend that is training to do the same thing with me - I am absolutely being held accountable. No way is there any chance of backing out. I should think of that as a good thing, but here’s the deal - what if I can’t be ready in time to run the half marathon? I do not want to fail. I would almost rather quit before I had the chance to fail - horrible, I know… but it’s the truth. I am honest to God scared of not finishing. I will try my hardest, I will train as much as I can, and I will do my best. I guess that’s all I can do at this point… we’ll see what happens when April rolls around. What am I bitching about? My brother just finished a full marathon at Disney World! Pretty sure I have the best role model. Either way - finish or not finish - it will make me a better person for trying… I guess…

Immediate goals:

1) In the near future finding a new job

2) Looking more into Radiology and possibly signing up for classes by the end of the year

3) Finish Attempt a half marathon.

done.ranting.

Looking back on 2011 and looking forward to 2012

2011 - Wow, what a freakin’ year. A lot happened. Just a little recap:

Found out we were pregnant - amazing news, although I was a little scared at first. Once I had the chance to think about how our lives would change I was so excited to meet out baby.

Wiener dog ruptured three discs in his spine - one of the scariest and heartbreaking moments in my life. Winston was in so much pain, he had to have surgery on his spine, and he only had a 50% chance of walking. He was on crate rest for 12 weeks while i was pregnant. He wasn’t allowed to walk, jump, run, play, or even hardly move. I remember getting home from work, taking him out of his pack-n-play and going outside to sit in the sun with him so he could enjoy the nice spring weather too. I also remember the small improvements Steve and I noticed while we were patiently waiting to see if he would ever be able to walk again, or even wag his tail for that matter. Ugh, I get teary eyed just thinking about how hard that was. The first time he wagged his tail I screamed for Steve. I remember him being able to balance on his own for the first time, that was amazing. Even more amazing - watching him take his first wobbley steps which soon became the winston wiggle. I can’t believe today he can run and play and he’s even jumping again (although he’s not suppose to). A miracle.

We moved into our new house - WOW! I love it. I love thinking of ideas to decorate, I love that we bought our first house.

Lily was born - I can’t imagine life without her. She is my little angel. I love her so much. Another miracle.

2012 - Something to look forward to…

Another brand new year, I guess this is where I make my NY Resolutions…usually I say “oh I’m going to lose so much weight by this time” Not this year… this is a different year.

Resolutions:

1) Enjoy Lily’s first year of life

2) Take my dogs for walks 

3) BE HEALTHY not to lose weight, but to just be healthy and in shape

4) Learn how to take really good photos, not just snap a photo on auto, but to really get into photography. (thankfully steve was a photographer :))

5) Do things that make me happy

6) Learn how to sew, croquet and knit

7) Finish Lily’s 1st year scrapbook

8) Finish 1st year of being married scrapbook

9) Go fishing… ALOT

10) Try hunting 

I think 10 is enough to keep me busy for a year… yeah… a lot to look forward to.

Lily turned 3 months today…

Sometimes I look at my amazing little girl and wonder how in the world she end up here. I can’t believe I’ve gone 25 years without this little person in my life. She truly is a blessing and I love her more every day. I love watching her development - starting to recognize my voice (yes she is definitely a mama’s girl already), grabbing my fingers, reaching towards toys, smiling and cooing. Any day now she will be laughing. I catch a few giggles here and there, but I think she does it accidentally. Ohhh, my little girl is growing up way too fast. I’m excited and sad at the same time. She’s only three months and I already feel this way? I guess I have a glimpse of how my mom felt towards my siblings and me. Every milestone in Lily’s life is something to look forward to, to celebrate, and to cherish, but once they pass I miss them. I already look into her eyes and wonder what she will be like when she’s 5, or 10, or even 16. What will she grow up to be? Her personality is really starting to shine through.

I’m so thankful she has such an amazing family to help raise her and watch her grow up.

3 months today… how am i going to feel when she turns 6 months?!

Early Christmas present… to me!

The other day my husband had been working in his “shop” (the garage). I thought he was working on making his dad’s cutting board for Christmas, and he told me I had a surprise coming as well. In the middle of the afternoon while I was playing on the floor with the Lilybug and the wiener dog, Steve ran upstairs to grab something he needed very quickly… as he was running through the dining room I asked what he was doing, and as he was running back down to the garage he shouted “Had to grab something for your table!” 

I heard his footsteps stop in before he reached the bottom of the stairs, then I hear him slowly creeping back up the stairs to peek his head around the corner. Thinking he was making me an end table to go with our new couch in the upstairs living room, I asked “You’re making me a table?!” Steve bummed out answered with another spoiler - “Yeah, I wanted to finish your new dining room table before we have Christmas dinner”

I have been waiting for him to make us a big farmhouse dining room table for over a year now. I was so excited I almost cried! He has been slaving away to finish this big dining room table before we have Christmas dinner with his family this Friday. I truly am blessed to have such an amazing husband. This table will stay with us for the rest of our lives and hopefully be passed down to our grandchildren.

I love my little woodworker :)

New Bed Time Routine

I’m beginning to love our new routine for bedtime with Lily. We used to do “business time,” which is lights out and quiet at 8:00pm, give her her last bottle, and wait for her to fall asleep. With the new routine I feel like she enjoys the family time we share right before she falls asleep.

New routine-

Sleepytime bath (which she absolutely loves) around 7:30 or so. 

After bath time, we let her play in her diaper since for some reason being naked is much better than wearing her clothes. She plays on her floor mat and works on her coordination. She is just starting to reach and touch toys on her own. It’s amazing to see her development right in front of my eyes. 

After playing around in her diaper for about 15 minutes, we make her her last bottle, dim the lights in her room, give her a clean diaper and a freshly powdered bottom. All the dogs will pile into the room and settle down while Daddy grabs her favorite book, “Goodnight Moon”, and I get settle with the Lilybug in the glider. She will drink part of her bottle and while I burp her, Daddy reads her book and she just gets completely absorbed into the images and colors. The closer Daddy gets to the end of the book, the sleepier her eyes get. We know she’s not long for this world.

After the book and a little burp, she finishes her bottle while Steve gets the dogs out (minus the wiener dog because he can’t leave my side). 

My favorite part about bedtime - once she’s finished with her bottle I will burp her while she lays against my chest and slowly falls asleep. I can tell she is completely content and feels safe in my arms as she lets out a little sigh and let’s herself fall into a deep sleep. Even though I know she is down for the count, I can’t help but snuggle with her an extra 10 minutes. Loving Lily is a wonderful feeling and I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.

Introductions…

Overall - My husband and I have been married for just over a year, but have been together for about 6 years, we just bought our first house in April, and had our first baby in September… Life has changed… for the better.

The Mom (me) - 25 years old, still trying to figure out what I want to do for my career, I am a new mother to a beautiful baby girl - Lily - , I consider all of my pets (3 dogs and cat) to be a family member, I am trying to get back to eating healthy and exercising, I love crafts and scrapbooking (even though I’m not very creative), I love love love my family and friends, and I feel like I have the best group of friends a person could ask for.

The Dad (Steve) - 27 years old, working for a big company, also teaches intro to speech at the college, loves woodworking, fishing and hunting are not just a hobby, they are  his lifestyle, is a wonderful father - not just to the pets, but to Lily too, and he’s the best husband I could ever ask for.

The Lilybug (Lily) - the newest addition, just over 2 months old now, first grandchild on my side and Steve’s side of the family, she is loved by her parents, her puppies, her grandparents, and her aunt and uncles. This baby was spoiled before she was even born, which is alright because she deserves it. She has made me realize how blessed I truly am. We are all very excited to see her grow.

The Wiener Dog (Winston) - He is my baby, he loves his new sister - Lily - , about 4 years old, has the most personality in a dog I’ve ever seen, loves his people, over the last year he has ruptured 3 discs in his back, had major surgery on his spine, was on crate rest for more than 10 weeks, only had a 50% chance of walking again, now he can walk, run, and play again (still has a little wiggle in his walk “the Winson Wiggle” ).

The Lab (Hurley) - Big black dog, about 5 years old, LOVES to play with anyone, loves to look out his window and bark at squirrels and rabbits, he is very vocal and loves to slobber.

The Terrier (Buddy) - ohhh buddy, he’s about 7 years old but still acts like a puppy, he’s scared of just about everything, he eats anything, he likes to dig holes under the fence and get stuck.

The Mean Cat (Tiger) - I think he’s about 6 years old, who knows, he picks on the dogs all the time, he loves to lay on Steve and knead his nails into his chest, he loves his kitty nummies and will rip open the bag himself if we leave it laying around, he does whatever he wants.

The Beginning

Yes, I’m starting a blog… 

To keep track of the special moments that happen in the Campbell Family.

To share funny stories about our animals and our baby girl.

To update family and friends on the growth and development of Lilybug.

To find inspiration and motivation.

To look for support during struggles.

To help make me a better person.

To embrace the life I have and the wonderful people in it.

This is the beginning of Campbell Soup… be prepared!

“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.”

- Ralph Waldo Emerson